On Political Correctness

I think whoever invented PC should be (to quote Col. Hogan from the '60's TV show "Hogan's Heroes") court-martialed, shot AND sent to the Russian Front.

Not very "PC", am I. Well, what can I say. We now have to call "Manhole covers" something like "Sewer maintenance service access portals"? Listed below are some other examples of pre and post PC terms. You tell me what you think about them.

Before PC                         After PC
Blind                             Visually (or optically) Challenged
Deaf                              Aurally Challenged
Lazy                              Motivationally Challenged
Web Master                        Chief person in charge of maintaining the web Site.
Communist                         Socialist
Socialist                         Democrat
Poor                              Financially Challenged
Rich                              Republicans
Republicans                       Rich
Ok, here's one of the first group of terms to be contributed. I would like to add that while I may not agree with all of these terms, it doesn't mean they're not real. I've seen more than a few of them actually used in the manner suggested below.
"before PC"                         "After PC"

(PC people do not recognize the term, "race," as valid)

Black                           -   African-American
                                    (NOTE:  DOES NOT INCLUDE
                                    LIBYANS, EGYPTIANS, WHITE
                                    DOES INCLUDE
                                    PEOPLE WITH DARK SKIN REGARDLESS OF
                                    WHERE THEY ARE FROM OR WHERE THEY LIVE.)

Oriental                        -   Asian-Canadian
                                    (NOTE:  NOT CONSIDERED "REAL" MINORITIES
                                    SINCE THEY TEND TO DO WELL)

Indian                          -   Native-Canadian
                                    (NOTE:  THE FOLLOWING TEAMS ARE NOT PC:
                                       Atlanta Braves
                                       Cleveland Indians
                                       Kansas City Chiefs
                                       Washington Redskins
                                     AVOID THESE CITIES!!!)

Chicano                         -   Hispanic
                                    (NOTE:  THE FOLLOWING ARE NOT PC:
                                       Cheech and Chong
                                       Chico and the Man episodes
                                       Cisco Kid
                                       Rosarita Salsa
                                       Speedy Gonzales
                                     AVOID!  AVOID!)

White Trash                     -   PC Unaware
                                    Rustically Inclined
WASP (white male)               -   Insensitive Cultural Oppressor (ICO)

(PC people don't like the word "sex" as it has confusing connotations)

Woman                           -   Womyn, Vaginal-Canadian

Girl                            -   Pre-Womyn

Housewife                       -   Domestic Engineer

Fireman                         -   Firefighter

Stewardess                      -   Flight Attendant

Meter Maid                      -   Parking Enforcement Aduciator

Post Man                        -   Post Person

Mail Man                        -   Person Person

Policeman                       -   Law Enforcement Officer
                                    Baton Boy
                                    Cal. Clubber

Prostitute                      -   Sex Surrogate
                                    (Teen Victim.  See:  Broken Home)

Mankind, Human                  -   Earth Children


Handicapped                     -   Physically Challenged
                                    Differently Abled

Blind                           -  Optically Darker
                                   Photonically Non-receptive

Deaf                            -  Visually Oriented

Poor                            -   Economically Unprepared

Bum                             -   Homeless Person
                                    Displaced Homeowner
                                    Philosophy Major

Hunter                          -   Animal Assassin
                                    Meat Mercenary
                                    Bambi Butcher

Whaler                          -   Blubber Lovers

Old Person / Elderly            -   4th-Dimentionally Extended
                                    Gerontologically Advanced

Conservative                    -   Right Wing Extremist Fascist Pig

Drug Addict                     -   Chemically Challenged

Bald                            -   Comb-Free

Bisexual                        -   Sexually Non-preferential

Midget, Dwarf                   -   Little People
                                    Vertically Challenged

Convict                         -   Socially Separated

Insane People                   -   Selectively Perceptive     
                                    Mental Explorers

(person with)                       (person with)
Learning Disability             -   Self-Paced Cognitive Ability

Tree-Hugger                     -   Environmental Activist

Logger                          -   Wood Weasel
                                    Paper Pirate

Dead People                     -   Dysfunctional Earth Children
                                    Biologically Challenged
				    Metaphysically Challenged	
Broken Home                     -   Dysfunctional Family

House Broken                     -   Family Disfunction

Cattle Ranch                    -   Cattle Concentration Camp (CCC)

Senile Bag o' Bones             -   Alzheimer's Victim

Ghetto/Barrio                   -   (EHA) Ethnically Homogenous Area
                                    Pre-Integrated Pre-Nirvana

Hamburger                       -   Seared Mutilated Animal Flesh (SMAF)

Cheeseburger                    -   Adding Insult to Injury

Cheating (in School)            -   Academic Dishonesty

Used Books                      -   Recycled Books

Trees                           -   Oxygen Exchange Units

Gang                            -   Youth Group

Pimp-mobile, Low-rider          -   Culturally Responsive Transportation

Drunk/Trashed                   -   Spatially Perplexed

Slum                            -   (EOZ) Economic Oppression Zone

Delicatessen                    -   Corpse Farm
                                    Charnel House

Obese                           -  People of  Mass

What do you think?  Email me at albert@albertlowe.com with your questions or comments.

usflag.gif - 12532 Bytes

Created: December 7, 1996
Last updated: May, 20, 2001
©1996 Albert Lowe. All rights reserved.
Designed and maintained by A.L. Computing